Blue Eyes
by MiaMadness
Summary: When Eli's drug addiction becomes out of control, his parents get help from the last person he ever expected. Can Clare help Eli change his life in just 4 weeks? Will she succeed, or fail? And will old feelings begin to resurface? VERY AU AND OOC! Enjoy! Read and Review please!
1. Chapter 1

Hey guys! So this is a completely new direction for me, and my first multi-chapter fic! I'd really appreciate your input and comments! Thanks! Here are some quick details about the universe I have created this story around, as there isn't a lot of the canon based world in this story except the odd piece which you will spot:  
AU and lots of OOCness. Clare was in the same year as Eli, but he was held back due to the drugs and all the classes he missed.  
Clare is at NYU, studying journalism.  
He's repeating 12th grade again, but on the same path to fail.  
Adam was in the year below Clare and Eli, so is in the 12th grade too, but the misfits were still friends.  
Bullfrog and Cee have tried everything to help their son, but nothing has worked.  
Eli's parents turn to the last person that he ever expected …Clare Edwards.

* * *

Exterior shot of Degrassi, students greeting one another before heading up the stone steps and disappearing through the doors.

Two 12th graders approach the stairs, both their eyes black and sunken in due to the large amounts of sleep they have missed because of the wild parties the shorter girl always finds, and drags the slightly taller boy too. The boy has his arm thrown over her shoulder, as he glares at a boy who has a feminine look about him, causing the other boy to stall from saying something and retreating back towards a large group who look at the dark hair boy with pity in their eyes, while glaring at the girl who only smirked and blew them a kiss. The boy held the door open for the girl, and they moved into the school, heading for their lockers.

Their head teacher, Mr Simpson announced over the intercom that Elijah Goldsworthy should make his way towards the guidance councilor's officer, as his parents were waiting to see him. The dark-haired boy rolled his eyes and groaned, because kissing the smaller girl on the top of her head and trudged off towards the guidance councilor's office.

Eli pulled open the door, and fell into the first available chair; looking expectantly at his parents, Mr Simpson and Ms Sauvé.  
"Your parents are worried about you Eli, you used to be so imaginative and bright, but your failing the 12th grade again, and I'm afraid if you don't pass this year then I'm going to have to ask you not to return to Degrassi in the fall." Mr Simpson said solemnly. Eli put his thumbs up to acknowledge the principal, who just sighed with disappointment.  
"Don't you get it son?" Bullfrog began, "You're going to fail high school, hell even I have a diploma from high school! You ain't gonna get anywhere in life buddy, not unless you turn it around." Bullfrog went to touch Eli on the shoulder, but he flinched away, and he just let his hand drop. Cee sobbed into her hands, as Eli rejected his father.  
"We had to find some way of helping you, Elijah." His father's use of his full name caused him to flinch. "So we called in some reinforcements."  
Eli's brow furrowed before he let out a hollow laugh. "Who did you call? Fiona? Imogen? Gran?"  
His mother's soft voice stopped him from making any more sarcastic comments, "No Eli, we tried to get your friends to help you, but you just simply pushed them away more, and your grandmother doesn't want to see you until you are back under control and clean." The comment about his grandmother cut Eli deeper than he thought it would, although he wasn't close with his mother's parents, it still hurt him to know that she didn't want to see him.  
"We called in someone else, bud. We know you aren't going to like it, but it was necessary."  
The panic in Eli's chest was building until he felt like he was about to burst. He had to get out of here, he need to find Talia, he needed some release.

Behind him, Eli could hear the door opening and the soft click of heels on the floor, he looked at his mother for answers, but Cee, who had stopped crying, was refusing to even look at Eli, instead choosing to stare at a poster on the wall. Feeling the panic bubble up inside him, he turned to look into the sad blue eyes of the girl who broke his heart.

Eli jumped to his feet and banged into the side of Sauvé's desk. "No…no…no...NO! You didn't. CLARE, YOU CALLED, FUCKING CLARE." Eli screamed at his parents, Cee started to cry again, as Bullfrog rose to his feet, a look of anger crossed his face.  
"Your damn right we called Clarabelle, Elijah, your mother is making herself sick with worry about you! She was the ONLY one who could make you see any sense!"  
Eli felt as though the room was closing in around him, and he fell to the floor and started slowly rocking backwards and forwards, muttering to himself that when he opened his eyes, she wouldn't be here, and that he was just having a bad trip.

Eli screwed his eyes shut tighter when he felt a soft hand close itself around his arm and pull him slowly to his feet, before leading him out the door. He watched the back of her curly head lead him towards a silver car that he hadn't noticed this morning. She sat him in front seat before silently sitting the driver's seat and pulling out the car park and away from Degrassi. They drove in silence for 5 minutes, before she pressed play on the radio and the familiar sounds of Deadhand filled the car, before he could stop himself, he spun to look at her, but she refused to look at him, but he relished in the small smirk and the pink blush that appeared on her face. Eli moved to face the road and closed his eyes, taking advantage of the warm car and tried to get in an extra few minutes sleep.

When Eli woke up, they had stopped driving and he was alone in the car, but he could see Clare; she was wandering round the old church ruins they had found the year before. Eli smiled softly at the memory before getting out the car, and trudging towards Clare; as he figured he would get an explanation from her. He sat down beside her, and was silent figuring she would do most of the talking.

"Your parents approached Simpson a few weeks ago to get you 4 weeks of directed study. Directed study is when you get your assignments get emailed to you and you send it to them via email, you will still get tests and grades but it will not in any classroom or with any teacher assistance."

"What does that mean, what are they going to do with me?" Eli croaked - he had never expected that his parents would pull him out of school.

"It means that you have a choice to make Eli, no-one can make it for you. It's all down to you. No one is going to make you go anywhere." Clare turned to look at him, but he kept his gaze on the dirt. "You can choose to stay at Degrassi and continue to ruin your life, or…" Clare paused and bit her lip.  
Eli turned to look Clare in the eye, "Or?"

"Or you can come to New York with me and go cold turkey. Use those four weeks of directed study you have to catch up on everything you've missed, and get your application for NYU in. You deserve a chance at a bright future; don't ruin it by doing drugs Eli."

Eli just stared at Clare, "Go to New York with you? Are you serious!? Who's insane idea was this?!"  
"It was mine actually Eli; I thought maybe getting you out of Degrassi might help! Especially when your mother phones me at 4am crying her heart out because you've passed out and have had your stomach pumped again?"

Eli cringed; he didn't know that what he had been doing had been affected his mum so much, that she would phone his ex-girlfriend to confide in her, about Eli and his issues.

"And what happens to me when you're in class? Do I get to sit in your room like a good little boy waiting for you to get home? FUCK THAT CLARE! I'M NOT SOME PUPPY!" Eli started kicking branches around as a way to vent his anger.

"No Eli, you don't get to sit in my room waiting for me, sure you might be alone for a couple of hours, but that might be because I have class when you don't."

It took Eli several minutes to realise what Clare had just said, "When I have class? Clare, I'm not a student at NYU, I don't get classes! Hell I haven't even finished high school yet."  
"And you won't finish, if you keep this up Eli, and as for the classes. I spoke to the dean, and explained the situation, and he was very sympathetic. He's allowing you sit in any class you want – English Lit, Film, Media, Creative Writing. Simpson will also take any credits you get from any work that you pass at NYU towards your GPA at Degrassi, but you will still have to finish the required course work that Degrassi requires you to have."

During Clare's speech, a rare smile had begun to spread over Eli's face. "Any class?" He sat beside Clare with the smile still spread on his face.  
"Yes Eli, any class! But there are conditions that you need to know, before you make your choice." Eli just nodded, no matter what the conditions were Eli knew in his heart that he was going to New York.

"Condition 1. You go cold turkey that means no weed, no MDMA, nothing! Condition 2. You don't get any contact with anyone in Canada except Cee and Bullfrog, no texting, no Facerange, no video-chatting, no IM'ing, no nothing. Condition 3. You really try Eli; don't slack off because this is your future we are talking about, and you only get one! Do we have a deal?" She held her hand out for Eli, who's grin was now huge. He grasped her hand, trying to ignore the spark that he felt between them.  
"You got yourself a deal, Edwards."

Clare grin, before jumping to her feet and checking her watch, "Well we better get a move on then, the next flight out to New York leaves in an hour."

Clare turned and started walking towards the car, Eli ran after her, "Clare wait, I don't have any clothes, hell I don't even have my passport."

Clare put the key in the ignition and pulled away from the ruins, and headed back towards the freeway. "You don't, but I do. Cee packed a bag for you while you were out last night, and it's in my trunk, your passport and some money are in the glove compartment."

Eli grinned and turned up the music, Deadhand blared from the stereo. "To the airport Blue Eyes! Let's get this party started."

Even out the corner of his eye, he could see Clare's face turn red when he called her Blue Eyes, and just saying that gave Eli a good feeling about this trip, he knew this trip would change everything, and hopefully for the better.

* * *

Well? Good? Bad? Let me know! I have a good feeling about this story!

Lots of love and kisses!


	2. Chapter 2

Here's the next chapter, I hope that everyone is enjoying it so far! Please review, I really enjoy reading what you think of the story, and feel free to contribute any ideas or suggestions! I will credit you!

* * *

Being with Clare again made Eli feel more at ease and comfortable than he had in a long time; they joked and laughed as though nothing was awkward between them. For the past 20 minutes Eli had ignored the buzzing coming from this jeans, he knew couldn't ignore it forever. He bit his lip before glancing at Clare; he really didn't want to screw this up, not before they had even left Canada!

"You can check your phone Eli, I'm not going to stop the car in the middle of the highway and throw you out. We both know who is buzzing you, so you might as well get it over with." Clare said with laughter in her voice as she glanced at Eli who was trying to discreetly pull his phone from his jeans, which was more of a challenge because of his love for skin-tight trousers.

Eli's face flushed as he pulled the phone out, and winced at the screen. 14 text messages, 12 missed calls and 7 voice mails all from Talia. Before Eli could even think about phoning her, his phone buzzed in his hand and a picture of Talia appeared on the screen. Eli steeled his nerves and answered the phone, before he could even say hello, Talia's voice screeched down the phone.  
"WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU? SIMPSONS OFFICE IS EMPTY AND SAUVÉ'S HAS SOME OTHER FREAK IN HER OFFICE! YOU BETTER GET YOUR ASS BACK TO THIS SCHOOL RIGHT NOW, ELI OR SO HELP ME GOD I WILL….."

Eli never did find out what she would do if he didn't go back to Degrassi, because he rolled down the window and tossed his phone out, ending his call and his relationship with Talia. Clare let out a laugh, "Eli if you didn't want to talk to her, all you had to do was hang up."  
"And have her phoning back every 2 minutes? No thanks! Can we emm, pick me up a new cell when we get to New York, I'd kinda like to phone Bullfrog and Cee, just to let them know we landed safely and everything!" Eli didn't say it, but he was going to apologise too, he knew he had put them through hell and that wasn't fair on them in the slightest. But Clare probably knew that, because she was Clare and he was Eli and they could always read one another like they were reading a book.

"Course dumb ass, you're going to need a cell phone! We can't have you wandering round New York City and no way of getting in touch with you! I can only imagine the trouble you could get yourself into!"

Eli just grinned and looked back at the road, the sign for the airport showed that they would be arriving shortly. Eli opened the glove compartment and pull out the brown envelope with his name scrawled across it in his father's hand writing. Opening it, he removed his passport, and the fair amount of money that they had put in, he found his ticket, it was then the reality of the situation really begun to sunk in, he was in the car with his ex-girlfriend on his way to the airport, to get on a plane which would take him to New York. He would be living in close quarters with Clare and getting the opportunity to sit in some of the classes he would hope to be attending full time next year. Eli was determined to not fuck this up, but a sinking feeling spread throughout his stomach.

"Clare, pull over, please!"  
Her brow furrowed, but she did what he asked, "Eli what's going…"

Before she could finish her sentence, Eli got out the car and headed for the trees, Clare who had also exited the car, chased after him. "ELI!" She called, "What are you doing!?"  
Eli stopped suddenly causing Clare to almost smack into his back. He pulled a small package from his back pocket. "I got it last night at this party I went too. I want to do this right Clare; I don't want to fuck this up especially considering we haven't even reached the airport!"

Clare swallowed thickly, "And what are you going to do with it Eli." Her voice small and comforting, but underneath it he could hear the worry.

He weighed the small package in his hand, taking a few deep breaths he launched the package into the trees and watched it soar into the distance and disappear into the dense trees. The pair stood there just watching the trees, as Eli tried to repress the panic that was building in his chest. He almost choked on his own breath when he felt Clare's soft hand slide into his, "You did the right thing, Eli. You need a fresh start, and throwing that away was the first step. Admitting you have a problem and taking the steps to get over it." Eli just nodded; focusing on her presence was helping to repress the panic attack that was building in his chest.

"Eli, I hate to ask this, but do you have any more…stashed away." Eli shook his head, he tried to clear his throat, but it was too dry. "I didn't keep in my pockets, Cee would always find it and start crying, and then Bullfrog would flush it. So I started stashing it around my room. I'm going to have to tell them where I've been keeping it, so that they can destroy it, so that it's not there when I get back."

Clare just nodded, before pulling him gently towards the car. Once they were both seated and driving again, Eli could feel his starting to shake, he moved to sit on his hands to hide them from Clare, but she reached out to stop him.

"You don't have to hide that from me Eli, I understand what your about to go through, and there's going to be times when you hate me for doing this, and you're going to say some pretty shitty things to me. But understand me Eli; I want to help you get better."

Eli just nodded, and rolled down the window to get some fresh air in the car. The sounds of Deadhand still blaring from the stereo helped him drown out his thoughts; his throat seemed drier than ever as they sped towards the airport.

After checking in and going through security, Clare and Eli still had 30 minutes before their plane was due to leave, Clare offered to go and buy the two some snacks for the 2 hour plane journey, but Eli declined, saying that he was going to try to get some more sleep during the flight. Clare had agreed but said that she would pick him up some water if he got thirsty. While Clare went shopping, Eli went into the closest bathroom and winced when he seen his reflection in the mirror. No wondering the woman behind the desk asked him if he was a nervous flier during check-in. Eli quite literally looked like hell, his eyes were black and sunken in, and his face was as white as sheet, when contrasted with his dark clothes, Eli wondered why he hadn't scared away any of the small children they had passed while walking through the airport.

Turning the tap on, Eli splashed water on his face in a vain attempt to wake himself up; he knew that his appearance would have to get a lot worse before he got better. Talia had been pumping him full of God knows what which had done hellish things to his organs; he hoped that these 4 weeks away would do him good. Being with Talia caused him to push his dream to come to New York and be a director to the side, he missed Adam, Fiona and Imogen; he missed being friends with everyone and spending time with them! Hell he even missed talking to Jake and Mo. When Talia came into the picture, they had all tried to pull Eli out of his downward spiral, but no one could, because the only person who had the power to help Eli had gone. She went to New York early on an early admissions scholarship, they didn't even try stay in touch with one another – the break had been difficult for Eli, which caused him to rely heavily on Talia.

Now one year later, Eli was standing in an airport bathroom, on the brink of destroying his life to the point of not being able to fix it, with the one person Eli was sure didn't care about him anymore. But clearly everything that Eli knew was wrong because here he was and here she was; back together again, although not in the way Eli would have liked. He knew that he would always have feeling for Clare, she was the girl who pulled him out his depression after Julia's# death, helped deal with his hoarding and bi-polar; but when Eli started on the drugs, it became too much for her and she ran; and looking back now, Eli wanted to praise her for sticking around for as long as she did. Eli vowed to make it up to her, she deserved something better.

Exiting the bathroom, Eli stopped Clare almost instantly, he could pick her out in a group better than he find his own parents at time, she was sitting on the plastic chairs in front of their gate reading Chuck Palahniuk's book "Lullaby". Eli grinned as he moved round the chairs to sit beside her, as he collapsed into the chair which squeaked under his weight he said, ""You tell yourself that noise is what defines silence. Without noise, silence would not be golden. Noise is the exception."  
Clare grinned up at him, "Well done, still being pompous enough to quote the book I'm reading to me! I see your personality hasn't changed Eli!"

Eli just stuck his tongue out at her, "How long until we leave?" Clare glanced at her watch, "Within the next 10 minutes I'm sure, they've already boarded the first class passengers." Eli nodded, and let Clare go back to her book as he watched various planes take off, and parents try to keep their hyperactive children under control.

Once they had boarded the plane and had watched the in flight safety demonstration, the plane headed towards the run, Eli rested his head on the back of the seat and closed his eyes, but before he could drift off, he felt Clare's iron grip on the back of his hand. He opened his eyes and turned to look at her, remembering that she was a nervous flier, he grasped her hand more firmly and rubbed his thumb gently on the back of her hand trying to calm her down.

Once they were in the air, Eli didn't let go of her hand, he simply closed his eyes and fell asleep, still drawing lazy patterns on the back of her hand.

* * *

When Clare woke Eli up 2 hours later, they had landed and Eli got his first look at New York City, being here felt right to Eli like this is exactly where he should be, and being here with Clare felt even better.

Once they had collected their bags and hailed a cab, they headed towards the closest phone store so that Eli could get his phone.

After Eli had gotten his phone, the cab right back to Clare's apartment was silent as Eli played the phone, Clare was checking her messages and replying to some text messages. Once they had arrived outside the large building, Eli collected their bags and followed Clare up the stairs to the third floor, apartment 3c. When Clare opened the door, Eli automatically knew that this is where Clare lived, even if she wasn't standing right in front of him. The room just seemed to ooze Clare, there were multiple books strewn around the room, articles that Clare had clipped out from various newspapers and magazines were pinned to the cork board above the desk which was covered with more paper. The apartment was completely open-plan, with only one door which Eli guessed lead off into the bathroom.

He knew that he would be living in close quarters with Clare, but he wasn't entirely sure how they were both supposed to fit into the small apartment. Eli placed the bags in the middle of the kitchen, and continued to look around. A small smile spread across his face as he spotted more of his favourite books on various surfaces, even spying a few movies that he liked around the TV stand.

"Well?" Clare asked nervously from where she stood at the bottom of her bed. "It's amazing." Eli grinned at her, "you made it YOUR home Clare, and it's amazing!"

Clare's cheeks flushed a soft pink and muttered thanks in his direction.

As Eli continued to look around, this is when he noticed a slight problem.  
"Ehh, Clare. You have two armchairs, but no couch, and there isn't enough floor spaces…Where am I supposed to sleep? I know I resemble a vampire and everything, but I promise you, I'm not!"  
The blush on Clare's face deepened, "Eli, we are going to have to share a bed, if that's okay with you, I mean I suppose I could shove the chairs together to try to create a make-shift bed, but…"  
Eli tried to fight the blush he could feel building on his own face, "No, no. It's fine! We're adults now; we are share a bed without it meaning anything."

For a split second, Eli swore he seen disappointment flit across Clare's face, before she put a smile on her face! "Yeah, we are adults, and it's only weird if we make it weird! Right, I've cleared some space for your clothes in the drawers, and there are some spare hangers in the wardrobe. Extra towel are under the sink in the bathroom, feel free to shower and make yourself at home. I'm going to go out and get something to eat for us, because I'm getting pretty tired, and we have to be in the dean's office for 10:30am tomorrow morning!" Clare grabbed her purse, and squeezed Eli's hand before leaving the apartment.

Eli took a minute to adjust to his surroundings; he put his bag on the bed and started to unpack what CeeCee had put in his bag the previous night. After emptying the bag and putting the now empty bag under the bed, Eli turned to look at Clare's smaller bag. He debated on whether or not to unpack that. Eli picked up the bag and weighed in his hands, before deciding to open it. After unpacking both bags, Eli headed into the bathroom to shower; he was hoping that showering would help him feel more human.

When Eli emerged from the shower 20 minutes later, he could hear Clare moving around outside, Eli got dressed into some pyjama bottoms and exited the bathroom towel drying his hair.

"Thanks for unpacking that bag, Eli you didn't have to do that." Eli glanced at Clare who was still wearing the dress and heels she'd arrived at Degrassi in.  
"It's no bother Clare, least I could do considering your letting me live with you. Bathroom is free, if you want to get changed."  
"Thanks, I'm gonna eat something first then go shower up, because I'm starving!"  
Eli glanced around the apartment once again, noticing that Clare had attempted to straighten up.

Clare just grinned and nodded at the food that was strewn over the small breakfast bar, "Hungry?" Before Eli could even think about answering, his stomach let out a loud grumble as if answering for Eli. They both laughed as Eli picked up the carton of Chinese food and glanced up at Clare in surprise. "You remembered?" "Course I did, how many times did we get take out at home? I think I still remember what you like." Eli didn't reply as he began to inhale his food, Clare just laughed and sat in front of the TV which was playing the Wizard of Oz, Clare's favourite movie.

After Clare had finished eating, she excused herself to go shower, and told Eli that he could head to bed if he was tired. Eli just nodded and continued to watch the film as Dorothy clicked her heels together. Once the credits started rolling, Eli switched off the TV, and checked that the door was locked. Eli was just getting into bed when he heard the shower shutting off; 5 minutes later, Clare exited the bathroom and made her way towards the bed, switching off various lights as she went, until the only light in the room was the lights coming in from the windows.

Eli shifted over slightly as the mattress moved as Clare climbed in, the two in silence for a while until Clare yawned loudly; cause the two to share another laugh.

"Goodnight Eli." Clare said softly as she turned to lie on her side, so she was facing him.  
"Night Blue Eyes." Eli replied, but Clare was already sleeping.

Eli didn't fall asleep instantly; he took some time to think about how much had changed in the short space of today. I mean if you would have told him last night that he would in New York and sleeping in the same bed as Clare Edwards in just 24 hours, he would have asked you if you were high.

He sent a quick text to his parents letting them know that they had arrived safely, and that he would phone them tomorrow after his meeting with the dean to let them know how it went and explain why he has a new number. He glanced at Clare one more time before closing his eyes and falling into the best sleep that he'd had in a long time.

* * *

There you go! Chapter 2! I hope that you are enjoying the story so far! Please remember to review, as I love hearing from you! Thanks so much for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

Look at you lucky, lucky people getting two chapters in the one day! I've been brimming with ideas recently, so I'm just trying to get as many of them down as I can! Please remember to review! Pretty pretty please!

* * *

It was the faint scent of strawberries and the sunlight streaming in from the window that woke Eli up, he sat up bolt right in confusion as he took in his surroundings; it took him a few seconds to realise that he was in New York City and that he had slept in Clare Edwards bed. He had come to New York with Clare to go cold turkey from all the drugs that Talia had given him, and once again Clare had saved him from a downward spiral.

He flopped back into the pillows as he watched Clare potter about in the small kitchen, she hadn't noticed Eli waking up, and so he had a few minutes to really look at Clare. She had grown her hair out so it was just rest above her breasts; her blue eyes were the same and she hadn't grown. Eli watched her move round the kitchen opening various cupboards and drawers as she cooked over the small stove. Her pyjama shorts skimming her bottom, and Eli realised with a jolt of pleasure that she was wearing one of his old T-shirts. Eli continued to watch Clare for a few more minutes before finally dragging himself out of her bed, to help her cook.

She turned when she heard him moving, and smiled softly at him.  
"How did you sleep? I tried to wake you but you refused to budge, you called me CeeCee twice"  
"Like a baby, best sleep I've in God knows how long! Oh, sorry Clare! So used to CeeCee trying to wake me, you know!"  
Clare just smiled and began plating their breakfasts; they exchanged small talk before Clare jumped in for a quick shower, before their meeting with the dean.

* * *

Eli walked up the stone steps towards the building which housed the dean's office; he had stuffed his hands in his pockets to hide his shaking hands, although he was shaking due to the withdrawal symptoms he was experiencing, but because of nerves. He had made his choice about what subjects he wanted to sit in during his month in New York, and during that time he'd be working on his application for the coming year.

They reached the office and Eli turned to Clare panic written all over his face. "Clare, I don't think I can…" Clare squeezed his hand, "You can do this Eli, and you belong at NYU! This is your DREAM school!" She gave him a comforting smile, "I have class to get to Eli, and you have a key and the address of my place. Go home after your interview if you want, or you can go sightseeing! Just don't go to 5th Avenue without me!"  
Eli grinned and nodded, he watched Clare walk back down the hall they had just walked up, before she disappeared round a corner. Eli squared his shoulder and knocked on the heavy wooden door. A deep voice within called out, "Come in."

He took a deep breath and steeled his nerves before entering. He watched as the dean indicated to the brown leather chair in front of his desk; Eli moved stiffly towards it, and sat down slowly.  
"Don't be scared, Elijah, I'm not going to yell at you. Your friend Clare explained your situation to me, and I understand, I had a brother who got involved with drugs, but unfortunately we were too late to help him, but I'm determined to help you. Have you chosen which subjects you would like to sit in during your stay with us?"  
Eli just nodded, relaxing slightly, but still on edge. The dean clapped his hands together once, before settling down in front of the computer. "Excellent, now which option have you chosen?" The dean peered at Eli, who cleared his throat, "Film." "Wise choice, m'boy, now why did you pick this subject?" Eli looked alarmed, he wasn't expecting any questions. The dean must have seen the panic written on Eli's face. "Ahh, don't worry Eli, it's just a few basic questions, just my way of getting to know you." Eli just nodded, "I suppose I've always wanted to be a director, I directed a few school plays before I erm, fell off the wagon so to speak." The dean just nodded, and pulled out a copy of "Stalker Angel" Eli leaded forwarded, "How did you…" "Clare gave it to me, she felt like it might help me understand you more. And I believe it did, and with your permission, Elijah. I'd like to put you in some creative writing seminars to help channel your creativity."

Eli nodded; he hadn't thought about writing in almost a year, it used to be like a second nature to him, now he was wondering if he would be suffering from some major writers block! He watched the dean in put some detail into the computer, and print out a sheet of paper and hand it to Eli. "Take this to the admissions department which is two floors above us, they will give you your student ID and your class schedule. You will start tomorrow, I really do hope you will enjoy studying with us, and if all goes well, we might see you next fall."

* * *

After Eli got his ID and schedule, he took a walk round campus, familiarising himself with the layout and the buildings were his different classes would be held. He decided to walk back to Clare's apartment which was a 15 minute walk away from the main campus; he wanted to take in as much on New York as he could. As he walked down the busy streets, he stopped a street vendor selling flowers and even from this distance he could spot Clare's favourite flowers: red tulips. As he walked up the stairs to Clare's flat, he smiled because this is how he wanted to come home every night: to Clare. Or at least to the apartment Clare lived in, because she was mostly likely going to be in after him.

When he opened the apartment door, the first thing he seen was Clare sitting at the desk, with her hair sticking up all over the place as though she'd run her fingers through it in frustration. He closed the door, the noise causing Clare to turn round, when she seen him, a smile spread across her face. "Eli, your home! I wasn't expecting you back for a while." Eli shyly held the flowers out to her, "For you, my way of saying thanks for letting me live her with you." A faint blush covered her cheeks as she look the flowers from him, "Eli, they are beautiful! You remember my favourite flowers?" She kissed him softly on the cheek as she walked passed him to put them in water. Eli was glad she couldn't see his face which was the same colour as the flowers. Eli just shrugged as he watched Clare fill a pint glass with water for the flowers.

"How was your meeting with the dean? Did you get the classes you wanted?" Eli nodded, "You showed him Stalker Angel?" "Yeah, you don't mind do you? He asked about you, and what you used to be like before…everything happened. So I gave him a copy of Stalker Angel." "I don't mind, I just didn't realise how much you worked to get me in here." Clare's face turned pink again, "I wanted to help you Eli, and you needed that." There was a pause before Eli cleared his throat, and Clare dropped her gaze. "Oh, CeeCee called while you were out, she wanted to know how things were, she said your text last night was not as descriptive as she would have liked, and she is expecting AT LEAST a 7 page email, detailing absolutely everything that's happened since we left Degrassi." Eli let out a loud laugh, "Yeah that definitely sounds like CeeCee, did she ask about the new number?" "Mhm, I had to explain why you threw it out the window…." Clare trailed off, suddenly looking awkward. "What?" Eli's brow furrowed, "What's happened?" She swallowed thickly and played with her fingers. "Talia went your house last night, looking for you, apparently she was a mess and full of drugs, she was convinced that your parents were hiding you, and when she tried to go up the stairs, your mum stopped her and …." Eli moved towards Clare, the panic bubbling up inside him, "And what Clare, is CeeCee ok?" Clare nodded, "CeeCee is fine, and she has a black eye, nothing serious. Bullfrog managed to get her out the house before anything else happened. No one has seen her since." Clare reached out for Eli's hand and intertwined it with her own. "CeeCee is ok Eli, she's a big girl, and she can take care of herself." Eli focused on Clare's touch as he tried to repress the panic that was threatening to bubble over. He sniffed and cleared his throat, "I'm gonna go give them a call, they're probably waiting with bated breath by the phone." Clare nodded, but when Eli went to pull away, she tightens her grip on his hand causing him to turn to look at her with confusion written across his face. The sight he seen sent another jolt of panic through his body.

Clare's face was pale and her eyes were red and watery. "Hey, Clare, come here! It's okay." He pulled her towards his chest and wrapped his arms around her as she sobbed into the shirt. "I keep thinking about how that could have been you, what if you just decided to not come home night and just went missing. Or if you'd overdosed and died! Eli, I can't …." Clare's sobbed became more intense as Eli tightened his grip on her, burying his face in her face, trying to stop his own tears from spilling over. He didn't mean to hurt anyone with what he had done; he just wanted to feel something. Being away from Degrassi and everyone had really put things in perspective for Eli, he was determined to turn things around, and he was determined to get Clare back, because he felt safe being with her, he missed her and he knew deep down that they belonged together.

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After Clare had pulled herself together and excused herself to go and wash herself up, Eli called his parents, and for the first time in a really long time, they just talked. Eli told them about his interview with the dean, and his walk around campus and all the beautiful architecture that he had seen! He also told them about how he had been thinking about getting his application in by the end of his time here, as it would cost a lot less and be in sooner. He thought he heard CeeCee start crying when he told them about his plans to go to university. He steeled his nerves when he told them about throwing the drugs away on the freeway, and where he had hidden his stash in his room, he asked Bullfrog personally to flush it, because he knew that CeeCee wouldn't be able to handle it without crying.  
Eli glanced towards the bathroom door, a small smile playing on his face as he told his parents about wanting to try and fix his relationship with Clare, because he had always been at his happiest when he was with her. CeeCee started crying again, because out of all his girlfriends, Clare was the one she really considered family. After Eli promised to call again soon, he started looking in the kitchen for something to prepare Clare and himself for dinner, settling on a pasta dish, he began to prepare the meal. He tried to ignore Clare's gaze which was fixed on his even though she was pretending to read a book for her journalism seminar. After he plated the food, he turned to face Clare with his infamous smirk on his face, "See something you like here, Clare?" Clare moved towards him, "I do actually Eli, it's the pasta." She stuck her tongue out at him as she moved back towards her chair; Eli rolled his eyes and followed her, picking up Chuck Palahniuk's "Haunted" as he passed. He collapsed into the opposite chair, and two ate in silence as they were drawn into their respective books.

Two hours later, the Eli and Clare were sitting laughing with tears streaming down their faces as they shared stories about happier times at Degrassi, they both realised that Adam was the root of their funniest memories. Thinking about the younger boy made Eli feel guilty, Adam had tried to approach Eli many times during the past year, but Eli had always blown him off, and ignored him. He even stopped going to the comic books store to avoid Adam, instead he spent all his time with Talia and her friends. He made a silent vow to himself to treat the shorter boy to an entire day filled with comic when he got back to Degrassi; he had a lot of wasted time to make up for.

Clare moved towards their abandoned dishes, but Eli jumped up, "Ah! No you don't! I cooked, so I get to clean up! You missy, get to pick the film." Clare looked like she was going to protest, but with the look on Eli's face; she knew any fight she put up would be dismissed. Eli could be as stubborn as a mule at times. Clare moved towards her DVD collection, she had managed to collect a fair few so she had a good few to choose from, but she knew the film that they both wanted to watch: Christopher Nolan's Batman Trilogy. She placed the three films on the small table beside her bed, and moved towards the kitchen. Eli spun as he heard her approach and fixed with he must have thought to be a reproachful look, but to Clare, Eli just looked like he was eating a lemon.

"Calm down, Mr grumpy pants, I'm only getting the popcorn!" Eli nodded once before turning back to the sink. Clare popped the packet into the microwave and pushed the start button, moving back towards the bed, she grabbed her pyjamas off the floor and headed to the bathroom to change. When she emerged 5 minutes later, the dishes were done, the popcorn was in a bowel on the bed in, and Eli was lying on the bed wearing the same clothes he had went to sleep in the previous night, this was the first time Clare got a good look at him in the light. Even thought it had been over year since they had broken up, Clare still thought that Eli looked amazing! Moving towards the kitchen she grabbed two bottles of water from the fridge, she tossed one to Eli who caught it and drank half the bottle in one gulp. Clare settled herself on the bed, she turned to Eli to tell him to press play when his guitar pick necklace caught her eyes, or rather what was attached to the necklace.

"You still have it." Clare blurted out before she could stop herself, she could feel her own face turning red as Eli looked at her in confusion. "Still have what?" He cocked an eyebrow at her, "Do we need to call the nice men with white coats, Clare-bear?" "My ring." She indicated to his necklace. "I didn't think you would still have it, never mind still wear it." Eli played with the ring on his necklace and gave her a funny look, "Course, I still have it Clare, we may have broken up, but that doesn't mean I forgot what you gave me." Clare flushed as the memory came flooding back to her, the night she had given Eli her ring and her virginity. She coughed awkwardly, "Should we…" she nodded towards the TV; Eli nodded, but regarded her strangely, and pressed play on the remote.

Half way through The Dark Knight, Clare fell asleep with her head rest on Eli's chest; Eli was struggling keep the grin off the face as he remembered how they had ended up in this same position during the first time they had watched this film together. Eli tried not to jostle Clare too much as he moved the bowel to the small table beside the best, he placed the remote beside it after turning off the TV, they would finish this trilogy one day without one of them falling asleep! Eli switched off the small bed side lamp Clare had, and the apartment was plunged into the already familiar darkness. Eli shifted slowly, so that he was lying comfortable, Clare moved on to his chest move and lay on hand on his stomach. Eli felt his heart jump at the contact of their skin; he placed a soft kiss on the top of her curly head, before play with the ring that he hadn't taken off since Clare had given it to him the night they had taken their relationship to the next level. He could just read the inscription in the faint light coming in from the outside: "True Love Waits." Eli would always wait for Clare because he knew in his heart that she was his true love, he settled back into the pillows and fell asleep to the sound of Clare's soft breathing and the smell of her strawberry shampoo.

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Hopefully you've enjoyed these last few chapters! I really appreciate your comments on them! So if you have any suggestions or criticism, that box below is where to put them!  
Love and kisses!


	4. Chapter 4

Here's the next chapter ladies and gentlemen! Don't worry thought! Just because I've gone further on in time, it doesn't mean that I'm done with this story! Keeping reading to find out what ... interesting things happen this time! Remember to _**REVIEW**_

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By the end of Eli's second week in New York, he was in love with the city and its people; he liked that he wasn't expected to smile at everyone he passed. But what he liked the most was that no one knew he was unlike at Degrassi. He will forever be known as the kid with the dead ex, or the kid who drove then crashed a hearse, or the kid who went crazy and took loads of drugs. Here was just a guy who wore a lot of black and went to NYU, and he liked that.  
He also liked living with Clare … a lot. They had already developed a routine, she would wake before him and cook him blueberry & banana pancakes, and then once he was up, he would make the coffee because Clare couldn't make a good cup of coffee to save herself. While she was in the shower, he would look over her essays and article, giving her pointers and constructive criticism, and while he showered, she would take his comments into consideration, and adjust parts of her work. They would both walk to the main campus together, before parting in front of her building before Eli walked the extra 5 minutes to where his classes were held.

It wasn't the same as the Drama and Media classes at Degrassi; in Degrassi he was a big fish in a small fish tank, he was a tiny fish in an ocean of bigger ones. But he did his best to get his ideas on the table, and being Eli he was very good at being heard.

Nothing everything was sunshine and daisies though, due to his withdrawal from all the different types of drugs he had taken. There were days when he refused to get out of bed, and there were nights were all he did was scream at Clare for "ruining his life" and being a "controlling bitch that needed to remove the stick that was shoved up her ass." Then there were other days when he had to stop mid-way up the stairs because his heart was racing and he was struggling to breath. On the rate occasion he was awake before Clare, it was because he was vomiting the contents into the toilet.

After a particularly bad night, when all he had done was throw up and made snide comment to Clare, Eli was lying face down on the bathroom floor, letting the cool tiles numb his naked chest. It was nights like this when Eli wanted to give up, go find a joint and take a hit; just to get rid of these effects. Almost instantly after these thoughts would pop into his head, he would picture CeCe – the last time he had seen her. Tear tracks down her face and refusing to even look at him, because she couldn't even recognise her own son anymore. He would cringe about all the shit he had put both his parents through – the emotionally abuse he had hurled at CeCe while coming down from a high and the physical abuse he had given Bullfrog, although Bullfrog never retaliated, he always looked at Eli with pity, which made him want to punch it off even more.

He could hear her moving around in the kitchen, running the tap, opening cupboards and singing along to the radio. He heard the door open and he could feel her eyes on his back, her gaze burning holes into him. The bile rising in this throat caused him to move weakly towards to toilet where he tried to empty his already empty stomach; Clare moved to rub his back as he dry heaved into the toilet. Once he was finished, she handed him a tall glass of ice water which he gulped greedily soothing his burning throat.  
"I fucking hate this." He croaked, "Its bullshit! I'm sick and tired of the throwing up, the chest pains, the constant shaking, the depression and the anxiety that likes to his me at the worst times imaginable! Yesterday, I had to leave my media presentation cause I flipped out! I don't know how much longer I can do this Clare; I'm really ready for throwing in the towel!"

Clare stayed quiet and continued to rub his back; she rested her head on his shoulder, her warm forehead contrasting with his frozen body giving his goose bumps.  
Her quiet voice, speaking volumes,  
"You need to keep going Eli, you know you can beat this addiction. You deserve a happy and full life! You deserve everything: the perfect wife, 2.5 kids, the amazing job and the white picket fence! I know you can kick this in the ass Eli, I believe in you!"

A warm fuzzy feeling spread through his stomach, he could imagine going home to Clare every night, playing with their little who was her double, shining blue eyes and everything. He let a soft smile grace his face as he stood shakily to his feet leaning heavily on Clare. The duo made their way slowly towards the bed, where Eli collapsed on the soft mattress, groaning in comfort, spending the night on the bathroom floor always wrecked his back.

He watched Clare potter around the kitchen making them a very light breakfast, so not to aggravate his stomach even more. They spent the Sunday morning watching old cartoons and reading in silence.

Clare POV

Living with Eli was easier than Clare imagined it would be, sure his drug withdrawal mood swings were killing her, and she'd cried more than once in the shower. She couldn't let Eli know that what he had said, although he hadn't meant any of it, still hurt her. When he was feeling better and coming round, he always brought her home flowers, cooking and let her choose the film they would watch as his way of saying sorry.

But what she liked most about living with him was his refusal to wear a shirt most of the time. When they had dated in high school, she almost never seen him without at least 2 shirts on, but since they had been in New York, Clare found herself wearing more of Eli's clothes then Eli usually wore! She liked waking up using his chest as a pillow with his arms wrapped round her. She had to admit that he wasn't a bad cook either, and she was eating a lot healthier than she had been before he moved in.

She liked reading over what he was sending back to Mr Simpson, and what he was handing in for his Creative Writing elective. It reminded her of happier times when they would read over each other's homework pieces for Ms Dawes. She had been emailing Mr Simpson about his progress and although she hadn't told him, she was very proud of his progress, due to his studies her in New York; he was ahead of his class mates, and only half a semester away from being eligible to graduate early from Degrassi. He had also been working so hard on his application, he had glowing references from his lecturers, now all he needed was one from Simpson and the guidance councillor and he could get the hell out of Degrassi.

She couldn't believe that next week, they would be back on a plane headed for Canada and the one person who could tear Eli right back down: Talia. With Eli's permission, she had used his facerange account to reconnect with his old friends, he had told her what to type, but was sticking to their deal by not using it himself. Their conversation with Adam had been the most hilarious of the bunch, once Clare had explained why Eli had quite literally dropped out of Canada, Adam had explained that most people thought he had OD'd and were shocked when Adam had gone in the next day and announced at the top of his voice in the middle of lunch that Eli was alive, well and living in New York City with a close friend who was helping him get off the drugs. He had told them how Talia had thrown her lunch across the room scream profanities about Eli and the "slag he was shacking up with." No one knew he was with Clare, and no one knew how well his recovery had gone.

Over the past few weeks, she had noticed that he was looking much less pale, and more human, he had got more sleep so he looked more alert and his eyes were so black. He was also eating a lot more and healthier, so he was gaining a lot more weight. He had also been taking advantage of the 2 hour time slot he had after his last class and when Clare was finished at the newspaper, so he had used the gym facilities, meaning he was more defined and had a lot more muscle on his body, and Clare definitely wasn't complaining.

When she had suggested that he come out her to escape Degrassi, she hadn't been expecting her feelings for him to come back with such power; she had been noticeably more affectionate with him: kissing his cheek before departing for class and greeting him with a hug and another kiss on the check, she had also been touching his arms a lot more to get his attention. And to her delight, Eli seemed to recuperating these affections taking every opportunity to wrap his arms around her and kiss her cheek when he had the oppertunity too! He had also been scaring away guys to had attempted to ask Clare out, by being the "boyfriend" She hadn't been complaining, she found it cute, and played along! There was one guy that she was interested in, and his name was Elijah Goldsworthy.

Of course, she was worried for him, would being back at Degrassi cause him to back pedal? Because unfortunately, he couldn't sit his final exams sitting at their desk or lying in their bed, he had to be in that exam hall along with everyone else, with Adam, Jenna, Connor and Talia.

Talia was another reason Clare was so nervous about him leaving, they both knew that the second that he walked through that door, she would pounce on him and try to lead him astray again. Although they had spoken at length about how he would react in these situations, speaking about them and being in them were two completely different things entirely!

Eli POV

Eli knocked on the wooden door, before entering. He smiled at the man sitting on the chair in front of the desk who in a few short weeks had become like a second father or a mentor for Eli. The dean had helped Eli through many difficult patches in his recovery, whether it be a way to channel his anger into exercise and not direct it at Clare or anyone else. He had also been an ear who would always listen about his fears about returning to Degrassi and seeing Talia again, whom he explained to the dean was the big reason is his downward spiral into the world of drugs. He had also grudgingly admitted his feelings towards Clare to the older man, who quite out of character squealed like a school girl. Eli had mocked him about it ever since, he was really looking forward to coming here, he was getting ready to send in his application, he only needed Simpsons reference then it would be good to go! He was hoping to get that before Clare left to come back to New York, so that she could hand it in for him, saving himself a lot of money and postage, he was also frightened that the mail service would lose the application, so by giving it to Clare he was eliminating both of those variables.

"Eli m'boy! Come in, sit! We have A LOT to discuss! This is our last meeting before you head back to Canada to sit your exams, and spend some time with your family, I'm sure they miss you rather a lot!"

Eli laughed and nodded, "I don't think I've had one conversation with CeCe where she hasn't started crying because she is "so proud of her baby boy, and how much progress he had made."  
The dean chuckled before leaning forwards, "And what about Miss Edwards…" Before Eli could stop himself, he could feel like blush spread over his face, almost as fast as the dean's grin.  
"I haven't told her yet, I don't know how to bring it up, I mean, I think she likes me, but we've done this before, broken up and gotten back together I mean, and it hasn't work either time, so why should this time be any different?"  
"Because Eli, you are both older now, and a lot wiser, you have been to hell and back together, but you are both still together! And if any friendship can survive a drug addiction, then why can't a relationship blossom from the ashes of this?"

Eli was at a loss for words, he had never really thought about it that way! They had been to hell and back together, and they had both given signs to the other that they were interested, but in true Eli and Clare fashion, no one had made the first move.

The rest of his final session with the dean, they had discussed his recovery and fears for returning to Canada, before Eli left, the dean got up to shake his hand. "I am so very proud of you Eli; you have definitely come a long way since our first few meetings. I look forward to seeing you here in the fall."

Eli thanked him and left grinning, as he passed students he had come to see as friends, even though he was just some kid who was here because the dean had a soft spot for what everyone else thought as "hopeless cases." The rest of this week would be spent handing in final piece of work, saying goodbye to friend's and teachers, packing and building up the courage to walk through those front doors of Degrassi.

He could see Clare sitting at their usual bench under an elm tree, she spotted him coming and stood up to hug him, her lips brushing the corner of his mouth, he fought back a blush as butterflies took over his stomach. He smirked at the pinkness that seemed permanently embedded in her cheeks when he was around. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders as they walked towards his last creative writing class, Clare was rambling on about some student event she had to cover next month, he just relished in the feeling of having her at his side, and being one step closer to kicking his inner demons to the curb. There was only one not so inner demon to deal with and then he could finally be free … Talia.

"Next week", he thought, "next week I will be free." He glanced down at Clare who smiled innocently at him, "Next week, I will have her again." He pressed a kiss to her forehead as he jogged up the stairs towards his classroom.

Clare POV

The entire apartment was an explosion of Eli, she wasn't sure where he had managed to gather all this stuff from, because he had arrived in New York with one bag, but was leaving with his duffel bag and a suitcase they had grabbed from Target on their way home yesterday.

Packing for one person was stressing the both of them out! Eli was more of a leaving everything to the last-minute and throw it in kind of packer, whereas Clare liked to have everything folded neatly and waiting by the door at the latest the night before. After some like disagreements they had both agreed to do it the day before they were due to leave, but being surround by Eli had made Clare rethink her decision. After several hours and some squashing they had finally packed everything up, and Clare didn't like it one bit, her apartment was to tidy now, she missed having Eli's things everywhere! She missed having any one of his t-shirts at her disposal when she felt like wearing one.

They had decided to go out for dinner on Eli's last night in New York; she had left it up to Eli who had surprised her by picking a nice restaurant on the lower East Side. They had shared some laughs and even held hands over the table, it might not have been a proper date, but in Clare's mind it was close enough! He had given her his jacket on their short walk back to their apartment.

After reaching the front door, Clare went to open the front door, but Eli reached out to stop her, she turned to look at him confused.

"I want to do this right Clare." She went to reply but was stunned to see him lean in; he hesitated when he noticed her rigid posture. He pulled back slowly, embarrassment creeping over his face. Clare panicked before throwing her arms around his neck and pulling his lips to meet hers. For the first in over a year, Clare felt at home.

Eli's hand reached round towards the door handle as their kisses deepened. They were in the apartment in less than 3 seconds, and before Eli had a chance to finish locking the door Clare was already attacking his jacket. He pushed her up against the door frame as he kissed her deeply.

She pushed his jacket off his shoulders, which landed in a heap on the floor just behind him, it was closely followed by her jacket and his tie, they were losing items of clothing the closer they got to the bed.

For the first time in a long time, they both felt at home and at peace.

No-one's POV

After they had become very reacquainted twice, Eli and Clare lay staring at the ceiling, talking about everything that popped into their heads. Clare was using Eli's chest as a pillow again, while Eli dragged his fingers up and down her arms.

"I'm going to miss you when you go home Eli, it's not going to be the same without you here." Clare said quietly, an undertone of sadness in her voice.

He dropped a kiss on the top of her head, "I'm gonna miss you too, Clare. So much! These past few weeks have been amazing! I don't want tonight to end, but it has too! But I was thinking, do you think we could give it another go, you know what they say, 'third time is the charm'." Eli trailed off awkwardly letting out a nervous chuckle.

Clare moved to look him in the eyes, "Eli…I'm all in." She pressed her lips again.

At this moment in time, they both felt like they were on cloud nine and that no one could touch them. The plane ride and the return to Degrassi seemed a million miles away from New York and their tiny apartment which was about to get a lot bigger for Clare. She wanted Eli back here and back with her as soon as possible. She didn't want anything to change between them, especially since they were back together, and happier than they had ever been in their entire relationship.

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Well there you go! The latest chapter! I really do hope that you've enjoyed it! _Suggestions, flames, reviews_ all go in the box **below**!

Love & kisses!


	5. Chapter 5

I wasn't going to put this chapter out so soon, but after the episode we just endured I felt like a bit of eclare fluff might just help us through this! I'm staying positive through this time and remaining optimistic that things will magically straighten themselves out; and things will be back to normal soon. **PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW**

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Being back here was weird; he wasn't the same person anymore. When he left Degrassi, he was a mess, two steps away from becoming a full-blown addict and only one step away from destroying his entire future; but once again, Clare Edwards had come to the rescue and saved him from destroying himself. Looking up at the letters above the entrance doors, in the eerie silence that fell over the school when Simpson held one of his "super important" school assemblies, Eli wasn't known for doing things under the radar, he wanted to make an entrance, and walking in, in the middle of Simpsons speech, all eyes on him was the BEST way to show everyone that he was back, and he meant business. And the other best thing about these assemblies was that they were mandatory, which meant everyone would be there: Adam, Becky, Luke, Dave, Connor, Jenna and Talia. Plus with Clare by his side, he was bound to get a reaction out of SOMEONE!

But the best part out this assembly was that the recent graduates of Degrassi came back to pass on some words of wisdom to the senior class, which meant all Eli's old friends would be there. And the only one who knew where, why and who Eli was with was Adam, who was clued in on what was about to happen.

Butterflies filled Eli's stomach as he waited for Mr Simpsons queue for his dramatic entrance, he could just make out the back of his parents heads, his mother seemed to be holding it together, and trying to look after too often, or cry. Eli knew as soon as he walked in there, the tears would start flowing. He turned to check his appearance in a wall display unit; he tugged nervously at his shirt, before flattening his hair, then messing it up slightly. A small hand landed on his lower back, he let out a breath he hadn't realised he had done as he turned to face Clare, who had an encouraging smile on her face. "They are ready for your big début."  
Through the door, Eli could just make out Mr Simpson's voice, "Now, this is completely different part to your assembly and has never happened before, and hopefully will never happen again. Ladies and gentlemen, students, teachers and alumni… I am very proud to RE-introduce to you…." Mr Simpson trailed off as he gestured towards the door.  
Eli turned to Clare, who gave him an encouraging shove, and he threw opened the double doors, and announced, "HONEY I'M HOME!" A stunned silence fell over the entire audience, he watched Jake's head snap to Helen, even from the opposite end of the room, and he could see Jake mouth Clare's name to Helen, who shook her head, Helen still thought Clare was in New York. He could hear people muttering if he was high, and what drugs he had taken while he was away. He could hear some bizarre stories being spread about where he had been, even though Adam had announced that he was in New York, clearly no one remember that. Eli walked down the centre, his hands stuffed in his pockets and a proud smirk stretched across his face. He could see the alarmed looks on his old classmate's faces; he knew they were probably wondering what drugs he had taken. As he stood up on the stage, he got his first view of the stunned faces of his classmates; there were a few faces he could pick out instantly: Adams proud face, Jenna, Connor and Dave's shocked faces, and Talia's smug face stood out more than anyone's. Eli had to repress a frown; did people really think that he couldn't change? He felt almost hurt! He shook Mr Simpsons hand, Simpson look ready to cry, as he sat down beside the other teachers, who also had stunned looks, a few of the sharing whispers.

Eli took a deep breath and turned to face the crowd, "One month. I left Degrassi, one month ago. And holy fucking hell has it changed. Sorry mum, but those are the only words that I can think of to describe the past 4 weeks, the past 28 days. There have been so many highs, but so many lows." Eli paused, "Ok, maybe highs wasn't the correct word to use there, because I have been clean now for 28 days, I haven't even taken a paracetamol! But my recovery started long before I got on a plane, it started on the freeway to the airport, on the side of a road, with one the biggest decisions I've ever made. I threw away the packet of MDMA that I have in my pocket. And quite frankly, it was the best decisions I could have ever made, being off drugs has changed me completely. I'm half a semester away from being able to graduate, I'm one reference letter away from sending in my application to university, and I'm one step closer to have my life back under my complete control."

He let his words, his confession spread as he looked out at the familiar faces, many of them looking more proud than shocked, all except one. But Eli wasn't focussing on her now.

"I haven't had any contact with anyone, with the exception of my parents and Mr Simpson. This has affected my recovery so much, because as much as I love it here, Degrassi has too many bad memories for me, and as soon as I can, I'm leaving again. It sounds harsh, but I've had my biggest lows here, and a fresh start is exactly what I need." Eli glanced at his mother, whose cheeks were tear-stained the pride for her son shining through, Eli had to repress a laugh when he looked at Bullfrog, who reminded Eli of peacock, and he was all puffed and proud.

Eli looked down at his shaking hand, and clenched his fist, "I'm still recovering, and I will be recovering for a long time to come, because the drugs were just harming me physically, but emotionally and psychologically too, so it's those scars that are going to take the longest to heal."

"I can't take all the credit for my recovery though because it definitely was a two man job, and they were a trooper. I owe my recovery to one person, this person put their neck out and got me into some amazing classes at university, who opened me up to an entirely new life, and it made me realise that, this is how I want to live. I owe my recovery, and once again my life, to Clare Diane Edwards.

You could have heard a pin drop when Eli announced that Clare had helped him recover, shock and disbelief flitted across the faces of his loved ones, and rage across another's. He turned look behind him as Clare appeared from behind the stage curtain, she ran full pelt towards him, and before they toppled over, he wrapped his arms round her and buried his head in her face. He could hear various woops and cheers from the audience. Eli put her gently back on her feet, wrapping his arm round her and moving back towards the microphone.

"The verbal abuse that I gave this woman on the worst days of my recovery is … indescribable. But she stood by me, because she had faith in me, and my ability to overcome any obstacle. Clare and her unwavering faith is the reason I am standing in this room right now, and not lying in a coffin six feet under. I owe her my life, and I love her for it."

Clare's eyes shone with tears, as she stroke his face with her hand, before softly kissing him, before she had the chance to pull back, Eli gently gripped the sides of her face and deepened the kiss, which she happily reciprocated. When they were done, he places a gentle kiss on her forehead before turning again to address everyone. "We spent hours trying to figure out what to say, how I would describe the past month. By the end of it, I had to choices: I could go all mushy and say how much Clare helped me, and how much I love her. Or I could give you the brutal facts, the vomiting, mood swings, the shakes, the works. But they all sounded too … intense for my mother's poor ears, so all I am going to say is that I'm clean, and I've been clean since I left Canada one month ago, and I owe it all to Clare. She was the light at the end of a very long and very dark tunnel, she picked me up and dusted me off when I really didn't think I could keep going, but she was right, I can beat this, and I have. I also want to apologise to you."

He turned to his ex-classmates and his old friends, Fiona had tears streaming down her face, as Imogen clutched her hand in complete shock; Jake looked torn, between being proud of his friend and being angry at Eli. "I put all of you through hell; you didn't deserve the abuse that I gave you or that I pushed ALL of you away. You are my friends, and you deserved better."

Eli glanced at Clare, who nodded up at him, "Thanks." He muttered into the microphone, as he pulled Clare off stage and hugged her tight, trying to control his shaking.

He could hear Mr Simpson go on about how proud they were of Eli and the progress that he has made, and once he had sat his exams, how well he would excel at NYU.

"Can we get out of here, please? I don't think I can handle all the stairs and all the questions, I just want to go back to New York and be in our tiny apartment watching old movies and reading books."

Clare nodded, "We have to tell your parents thought, you know what CeCe will be like if we disappear, or more like what Bullfrog will announce."

Eli tried to smile, but being back in Degrassi was dredging up too many bad memories and he really did feel like he was suffocating. Gripping her hand tightly, they moved out from backstage and hurried towards his parents. Bullfrog was on his feet when he seen Eli's white face, closely followed by Clare's worried one. A few muttered words and promises of dinner were shared before Eli and Clare departed the hall.

* * *

They pulled into the abandoned church where they had sat before Eli had made the decision to go back to New York with Clare and turn his life around. They sat in the car in silence, Clare reached over and rubbed Eli's arm.

"It was so hard being back there, all those memories…Everywhere I turned there were memories connected to it, sure some of them were drug hazed memories but I still remember them. You were right Clare, what you said a month ago, getting out of Degrassi did help, and now I'm back. I feel like I need to leave again, I don't know how I'm going to survive when I have to go back and sit my exams. And you need to leave in a few days, I haven't been apart from you throughout my entire recovery, you're my rock Clare. You're the reason I haven't given in, and I don't want you to leave." Eli's voice cracked as tears threatened to spill over on to his cheeks.

"You can do this Eli, it's nine days. Nine days then you never need to set foot in those corridors again, and in nine days, you can come back to our apartment in New York, but you know, only if you want too."

"Clare, I want to get on a plane right now and leave Canada, that's how badly I want to go home! Degrassi doesn't feel like home anymore, it's just a place with some many different types of memories. It's just too overwhelming for me right now."

Clare just nodded, "We can talk to Simpson, to see if we can get your exams bumped up a few days! I mean you are ahead of most of the class men, so why do you need to wait? You know the material and everything! Sit the exams, get your reference letter from Simpson and get on a plane. That's the plane, Eli. You can do this, I believe that you can do this, and not relapse. Adam won't let you."

Eli tried to grin when he thought of the younger boy, but the depression was building in him, so it came out as more of a grimace. He asked Clare in a small, almost child-like voice, "Will you get him to help me; you'll tell him not to let Talia near me, right?" Clare nodded and squeezed his arm, "She won't get anywhere near you Eli, I promise you!"

She leaned over and kissed his cheek, but Eli moved his head and caught her lips in his own. So in the back of the rental car, Clare helped once again, she helped his forget that she would be leaving soon, and for the first time, he would be recovering without her.

* * *

There you go my lovelies! You all deserve this chapter so much! And remember, there is still hope for another Eclare reunion in the future! Lets all keep our fingers crossed!

Love you all so very much, but please remember to **_REVIEW_**

Love & kisses!


	6. Chapter 6

I know, I'm terrible. I'M SO SO SO SORRY! College has been kicking my ass for the past few months, and my exam is on Monday and I'm totally procrastinating! But I knew I had to get something out to you lovely people! Please forgive me for my bad updating! Enjoy and review!

* * *

Waking up without Clare was weird for Eli, he had spent the past mouth with her 24/7; going from that to spending almost no time together wasn't good for Eli, he was already panicking that once Clare left that he would spiral again, and that she wouldn't forgive him this time. There's no way she could.  
Rolling over in bed, Eli automatically stretched out his arm to wrap it around Clare's waist because they always slept in on Saturday morning's, he sat bolt upright when he couldn't find. He was startled to find the bed empty, the walls black and the room wrecked. Flopping back down onto his pillow, Eli sighed. He was home, and Clare wasn't here, she had spent the night her own house despite a lot of pleading and puppy dog eyes from Eli. Glancing around the room he winced, Bullfrog had gone to town in here, pulling out everything, despite Eli telling him where his stash used to be, he knew that his parents just wanted him to be healthy, so he was glad they had done it; although he wasn't so glad that they hadn't tidied up after themselves. Looking around the room, he wondered how he lived like this and worst in the past! All he wanted to do was start tidying; a ringing from his open laptop stopped that train of thought instantly.

He walked over to his computer and a smile stretched across his face as he accepted the video call, "Goooood morning Blue Eyes! How was your sleep?" Eli said cheerfully, supressing a laugh at Clare's face.  
"It was terrible! I kept feeling around for you, it's not funny ELIJAH!"  
"I know, I know" He laughed, "I felt the same, gave myself a heart attack this morning."

A soft smile spread over Clare's face, "I didn't think it was possible to miss someone as much as I miss….HOLY HELL WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR ROOM." Clare's jaw was nearing the floor; Eli glanced over his shoulder wincing again.

"Yeah, Bullfrog and CeeCee wanted to make sure that there wasn't even the slightest trace of anything drug related in my room. Want to relive junior year and help me tidy up? Frankly I'd give any excuse to see you right now, even if it does mean cleaning."

"I'll be there in 20 minutes, love. See you soon." She blew him a kiss and ended the call before he had a chance to respond.

* * *

Eli wandered down the stairs 10 minutes later freshly showered, ready to confront his parents about his trashed room, but found no one. Just a note stuck to the fridge saying,

"Eli, we are so happy your home and we are sorry that we couldn't here when you woke up; but we HAVE to go grocery shopping! I don't have enough food to feed your father AND you at the same time! We shouldn't be too long, tell Clarabelle we say hi and _behave _Eli. Love and kisses, CeeCee"

Rolling his eyes, he opened the fridge and cringed at the contents, it was all healthy stuff, none of sugary deliciousness that used to live there. Before he could even delve into the cupboards to see what other abominations his mother had bought, the front door opened then closed again. Clare's voice rang out from the front hall.  
"Marco!"  
Smiling to himself, he replied, "Polo"

Clare's face appeared round the door a few seconds later, and in her hands was the best thing Eli had ever seen.  
"YOU BROUGHT BREAKFAST FROM THE DOT!"

Clare's eyebrows furrowed, "I did…it's also a bit worrying that you're happier to see breakfast than you are to see me."

Eli didn't reply, he was already shovelling food into his mouth and moaning in pleasure, he was dimly aware of Clare's laugh and a glass of juice being placed in front of him.

Once Eli had demolished his breakfast, he had dragged Clare up stairs and into his bedroom; he spun her like a ballerina in the room, where her jaw dropped again at the mess that had been left by Hurricane Bullfrog.

It had taken them nearly an hour to organise all of Eli's books; Eli was very particular about his books, they had to be in a specific order: by author in alphabetical order then by how much he liked the book. He had taken 15 minutes to decided what autographed Chuck Palahniuk book he liked best.  
The doorbell went and Eli disappeared to go answer it, leaving Clare to put away the book that Eli had deemed "shelf worthy." After several minutes of silence, Clare became concerned: if it was CeCe and Bullfrog they wouldn't have rung the door bell, if it was Adam or one of their other friends he would have brought them straight up, they knew about his previous hoarding problems.

* * *

Eli had been gone a while, and the lower level of the house seemed dead. Clare pulled her stiff limbs off the hard wood floor, and padded towards the stairs.

"Have you been kid…?" Clare trailed off; standing in the hall with a furious look on her face was Talia. Eli was standing in frozen looking between Clare and Talia, like he was watching the world's most extreme tennis match. Clare could see Eli's clenched fist trembling, as his poor veiled panic filled eyes flitted between the two girls.

"Clare, I didn't…" Eli croaked in her direction. Clare moved quickly towards him, grasping his trembling hand in her smaller one. She traced a pattern with her thumb on the back of it; it took several moments before she could feel him relaxing slightly against her, she wasn't mad at him, she knew that he hadn't decided to invite HER over!

Disgust filled Talia's eyes as she surveyed the scene in front of her.  
"What a sickly sweet scene this has turned out to be. Of course, Eli would go running back to you when things with me got a little more … intense. And you being #you took him back with open arms, right Clare? I thought you had more self-respect than that, Clare-bear!"

Clare's jaw tightened, "Get out Talia. No one wants you here." Clare had to fight to keep her voice level, and even more restraint to not throw herself that the girl in front of her.  
Talia smirked at Clare, "You don't own this house sweetheart, if Eli wants me to leave then…"

"Get out Talia. I … I don't want you here; I never want to see you or hear from you again. You took advantage of me when I was in an extremely fragile state. I was still trying to deal with Cam's death, and you just exploited my grief and twisted it into something … evil. You made me hate myself and everyone around me, you put me in an even worst mental state. I contemplated suicide, because I couldn't deal. I want you to get out of this house right now before I call the police. I want you to never speak to me or ANY of my friends or family again. I could happily live my life not knowing you anymore. Eli's voice had more strength in it than Clare had ever heard. Pride filled Clare from the tips of her toes to her scalp.

Eli had finally beaten his last demon, and his most prominent, physical one. Talia.

Talia rolled her eyes, "Whatever Eli, you fell came off the rails once before, who's to say that you won't fall off again." Talia turned to leave, just as she reached the door, she turned to look back at Eli and Clare, and "I don't remember you asking me to get out those times that we slept together." She paused, waiting for a reaction, not getting once; she rolled her and slammed the door behind her.

They stood in silence for several moments, before Eli slumped against Clare.  
"I know my room is a bomb site but can we take a nap? I'm bloody exhausted." He muttered in her ear, suddenly sounding like he hadn't slept in weeks. All Clare had to do was nod and lead him upstairs back towards his bedroom.

They pushed everything that was on the bed onto the floor, not even bothering to organise it, it was haphazard piles all around the room like a minefield. Eli handed Clare a pair of lounge trousers and a Deadhand tee shirt to put on, so she didn't crumple her dress, once she was changed, she climbed into the bed and snuggled into his side. Eli wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed the top of her head softly.

"I'm so proud of you." She said quietly into his chest, Eli didn't respond; he just buried his face in her hair.  
"Later, we will talk later babe." He yawned and tightened his grip on her, "Now it's sleepy time."  
Clare giggled softly, but closed her eyes and enjoyed finally being back in Eli's embrace, because this is exactly where she belonged. In Eli's arms.

* * *

Here you go my lovelies!

Enjoy and please remember to review!


	7. Chapter 7

I know, I know. I'm a terrible author, I'm so so so sorry for making you wait this long for this chapter, but mad doesn't even begin to cover how my life has been lately. Exams, more exams, finishing college and the never-ending hunt for jobs, plus there was a slight issue with my laptop, but it's all good now.  
Here's the next chapter! Much love and remember to review!

* * *

Waiting with Clare at the airport was one the hardest things Eli has had to do recently, ever since they had returned to Canada, he had dreaded the day when she had to go back to New York and he would stay here, finish his required course work and finally graduate from Degrassi; only then would Eli follow her back to New York where they would be happy and everything would be normal again.

The only thing standing in the way of that was 4 exams, graduation and two weeks of misery.

Clare's grip on Eli's hand was causing the blood to stop pumping to his fingers, this meant that they had turned purple and they were starting to throb a little; but this didn't bother him, he didn't want to let Clare go, even if that meant losing a few fingers.

A female voice crackled over the tannoy system, "Final boarding call for passengers from Flight 754C to New York." Clare whimper and Eli swallowed back the lump in his throat as he pulled Clare to her feet.  
"Time to go, Clare. You need to get on that plane! You have exams as do I" He wrapped his arms around her and buried his face into her curls inhaling her shampoo.  
Clare shook her head, and said something that which was muffled by his jumper, so Eli stroked her back and kissed the side of her head.  
"It will fly in, you'll barely have time to get used to being alone before I'm back and messing up the place, don't you worry Clare, everything is going to be ok, and we will be fine and happy."  
She simply nodded and stroked his cheek, he hated seeing her cry. It was almost as bad as watching CeCe cry, he pressed a final kiss to her lips and nudged her towards the gate.

He waited until she disappeared from view, and then watched her plane take off before finally heading towards the parking garage; his hands deep inside his pockets as he tried to stop the feeling in the pit of his stomach consume him and his thoughts.

* * *

Walking the halls of Degrassi again as a student brought back a lot of unwanted feelings for Eli: panic, stress, loneliness, unhappiness, depression; he had spent the previous night with Adam and Drew playing video games in a vain attempt to distract himself from the Clare sized hole that appeared next to him. But being back at Degrassi made Eli feel like all the progress he had made with Clare would be washed away if he even done one thing wrong, he didn't want to fuck up again…he couldn't lose her again.

"Well, well, well…Look whose back and without his little…bodyguard."  
Eli's entire body stiffened and he could feel his heart plummeting down towards his feet, or Australia. He rotated 180 degrees to face Talia who had a smug look on her face like she had been right about something and now wanted to gloat about it, and if there was something that Talia was good at, it was gloating.

Eli swallowed trying to wet his dry throat before saying anything, the last thing he wanted for her to know that she had a negative effect on him, because in her twisted, drug addled mind that would be the best way to push Eli down and to have him fall down the dark pit filed with weed, MDMA, all night rave and of course, the devil in all her glory – Talia.

"What do you want? I thought it told you to leave me alone!"

"Oh you did, but you know me Eli, I don't listen very well, especially to people who are hypocrites."

Eli held his tongue and looked her straight in the eye, he didn't want to give her the satisfaction of being able to get a rise of him, so instead he simple masked all his emotions and looked bored as he continued to stare at her.  
To anyone who didn't know Talia very well, would see her roll her eyes and walk away from the older boy, but Eli, who had spent large amounts of time with Talia during the previous year could see the panic in her eyes as she tried to regain control of the situation because she didn't deal well with having no control.

Watching Talia's retreating back, Eli knew on some level that she would not be making these next two weeks easy for Eli, she was definitely going to try to hurt him in one way or another.

He felt a hand clamp down on his shoulder, spinning on his heels he found himself face to face with Adam who had a slightly worried look in his eyes as he glanced between Eli and Talia's retreating back. Eli took a shaky breath before nodding, "Yeah man, just…a bit of drama, nothing I can't handle." He shot a shaky grin at Adam who nodded slowly before wrapping his arm round Eli's shoulder steering him in the opposite direction towards Ms Dawes room for their last English class before their exam on the Friday.

He had never seen Ms Dawes face glow with so much pride when he walked in the room, she looked like she wanted to hug Eli and cry at the same time, while probably on some level wanting to smack him upside the head for being such an idiot, but Eli was sure she wouldn't do that, she loved her job too much to mess it up.

He sat at the same desk he always sat at and tried to ignore the eerie quietness that was coming from the desk behind him; when Clare had been in this class there was always some sort of noise coming from her direction: papers shuffling, muttering as she re-read her own essays and Eli's too, but more often than not she would be engaged in conversation with himself and Adam. He tried focusing on Ms Dawes as she explained details of the book that they had studied. Catcher in the Rye had always been a favourite of Eli's, he was never really sure why, he supposed it was because he felt like related to Holden in some ways. It was now that Eli wished that he hadn't read most books because he wanted to be distracted by a lecture so he didn't think about Clare and the hole in his chest that threatened to swallow him whole, if he even thought about doing something that would jeopardise his future at NYU or his future with Clare.

Instead of listening to his favourite teacher like he should have done, he tried to imagine what Clare would be doing now, she would be back in New York and at class trying to write everything the teacher was saying two minutes before they actually said it, then she would get a coffee and sit down to re-write her notes so that they would be more legible when it came to studying for her exams. After that she would head to the library to check any books that the lecturer may have refer too, once she had done that she would begin the 10 minute walk back to the apartment where she would have a snack before settling down on the chairs to start any assignments she may have been given or to finish up one she had already started. After eating dinner and showering she would settling down in front of the TV to watch a film or curl up in bed to read a book, then she would fall asleep…without Eli being there. That's what bother Eli the most, was that they were so apart and he could do jack-shit about it because he needed to finish high school before he could go back to New York and back to Clare, beside after the rough year that he had, he felt like he deserved to finish high school and graduate with some of his friends, even if they weren't the friends that he had originally planned on graduating with.

Eli missed Imogen and Fiona, he missed their strangeness and their warmth; he had been a terrible friend to them and he really wanted to make that up to them, but they were in Paris now on a field trip from some fancy design school they were attending. He would have to email them soon, so that they could get something set up soon before he headed back to New York and lost himself in the safe bubble that is Clare. They would come back to Canada, of course, Christmas, birthdays, other holidays, but it still wouldn't be the same, it would different because he would have to leave again.

* * *

Eli had followed Adam round in daze for the rest of the day, he had continued to lose himself in his own him and he could tell that Adam was becoming concerned; the last thing Eli wanted was for Adam to think he was high, so he tried to engage the younger boy in conversation about video games and comic books, but Eli could tell even though Adam's responses were lively and full of just Adam being Adam – he could see it in his eyes that he was worried.

When they had wound up in The Dot, Adam had finally asked Eli why he was being so distant and non-responsive. Eli sighed and looked at the younger boy who looked like was about to have a panic attack.  
"Chill dude, I've been thinking about Clare, this is the first time in over a month that we haven't been glued to one another, it taking me a bit of time getting used to not have her here with me, I just want to be in New York in our tiny apartment, reading books or watching old films."  
Adam regarded Eli for several very long seconds before turning his head and pretending to throw up.  
"Gross, look I know you're happy to have Clare back, but was there a real need to tell me the lovey-dovey mushy side to it. Yuck, man I feel like I'm going to have to kill a hell of a lot of zombies to erase this memory from my brain." Adam faked a shudder before grinning at Eli.

"Come on then, let's go find you some zombies to shoot." As they were leaving, Eli patted Adam's shoulder to reassure him that he was doing fine, and that everything was going to be ok.

* * *

Hopefully this lived up to your expectations, and if not let me know why. I really want to hear your views and opinions on the story, and remember if you have any suggestions for plots or characters, feel free to leave your ideas in the reviews; and I double pinkie swear that you will be given credit!

Much love and remember to please please review! They make me smile!

Marie xx


	8. Chapter 8

I'm not entirely sure where I'm going with this right now, do you want me to continue it into Eli's first proper year at NYU or should I just leave it with Eli waiting to start NYU but being back in the US with Clare? Please leave your suggestions and comments in the review box and let me know, because I'm writing this for you guys and your views really mean a lot to me.

* * *

Eli's POV

Whenever Eli was left alone, this wasn't very often for obvious reasons. Talia had tried to corner his three more times since that day in the hallway.  
The first time it happened Eli had never be so happy to see Maya Matlin in his life, she had pulled some Media Immersions project from thin air and Eli was the only person in the whole of Degrassi that could help her and he had to help her that very second. Eli didn't really know much about the Katie's younger sister, except that she had been Cam's girlfriend, they both steered away from that topic of conversation as they sat together in the library pouring over a random book Maya had pulled from her backpack. Eli had spent 20 minutes loudly explaining different camera angles and lightening effects to Maya whilst pointing at geometry textbook. Adam had never been so confused when he walked into the library to find Eli and Maya in fits of giggles; it had taken 10 minutes to explain the story to Adam who had just rolled his eyes.  
The second time it happened, Mr Simpson had called his name over the tannoy in order to call him to his office to let him know that his reference was finished, and that Eli could now send away his NYU application.  
By the third attempt at trying to talk to Eli, Talia was becoming increasingly frustrated, so when Tristan dragged Eli away exclaiming that they were having a wardrobe crisis in the drama department, despite the fact that Eli wasn't directing the school play, and the fact that there wasn't even a school play being production, it was the end of Talia's very short fuse, she stormed over to Eli in the middle of lunch the following day and screamed until she was blue in the face at him, and then turned on her heel and walked away, knocking into people and sending their lunch trays flying. Eli was silent for several seconds before turning to Drew with the most bemused expression on his face.  
"Dude, did you understand a word of that? The girl is seriously crazy!" He turned back to his chilli, which he was basically swallowing whole, because well who didn't love a huge bowl of chilli?

* * *

Clare's POV

Being back in New York without Eli was a strange feeling; it was like being back in an entirely new place. Her apartment felt bigger, her nights seemed longer and she was unquestionably lonely at night without Eli there to cuddle with and to debate over the most random subjects, like what was better mash potato from a packet or actual homemade mash potato. This had led to a trip to the local deli at 3am to buy potatoes, so that Eli could make Clare mash potatoes because all this talk about mash potatoes had begun to make her crave them; this had led to Eli and Clare eating homemade mash potatoes out of a pot at 5 o'clock in the morning watching a quiz on the television and laughing at the callers who got the most obvious answer wrong.

Clare smiled sadly at her apartment, as a ring from her computer pulled her attention away from her trip down memory lane. A beaming smile spread across her face as she clicked the accept button and Eli's smiling, although slightly blurry face appeared on her screen. This was definitely the best part of Clare's day, when she got to video chat with Eli even if it was only for 10 minutes, she took any excuse to see his face and hear his voice with both hands.

Clare was doubled over in stiches as Eli told her about everyone's attempts to keep Eli away from Talia; she knew she liked Maya and Tristan for a reason. Although she knew if there was one subject that Eli could talk about for hours on end it was Media, even if he was making it up on the spot and using a geometry textbook for a prop, he was definitely meant to be a director, and if that didn't work then he could definitely branch out into acting, because with the serious look on his face as he described to Clare everything he had told Maya and with Talia believing it then boy should definitely have an Oscar before his 25th birthday.

Clare missed Eli so much, but being home and back with Cece and Bullfrog had really helped him, and it had also helped repair his relationship with them. The three of them had a standing date at Little Miss Steak every Wednesday night, so they could catch up and repair the strong bond that they used to have. Of course, Clare was ALWAYS welcome to crash whenever she was in town; both Cece and Bullfrog had mentioned this to Clare whenever they came to check on Eli and he was video-chatting with Clare.

A pivotal moment in her relationship with Eli's parents had come not long after she had returned to New York, Clare's stomach had dropped and her blood turned to ice when she was awoken at 2am by her cell phone ringing and Cece's number flashing on the display. The two females had sat up all night and discussed Eli and his recovery and despite Eli and Clare agreeing not to tell his parents the nitty gritty parts of his recovery, Cece had pulled it out of Clare, and as Cece sobbed quietly into the phone with Clare assuring her that Eli was never physically violent towards her, and he always felt terrible once he had recovered slightly, and that he always bought her flowers, cooked and let her choice the film as a way of an apology.  
But that wasn't the part of the conversation that stood out for Clare, they had just finished giggling over Eli's antics as a child, when Cece became very serious and told Clare that despite all the hardships and break ups that she and Eli had gone through, that Cece had always hoped that they would get back together because Cece already considered Clare her daughter and she would be very disappointed and slightly angry towards Eli if he didn't put a ring on Clare's finger. Clare was very happy that Cece couldn't see her at this very moment because her face must have gone several different shades of red. Cece had gone on to say that Clare had brought out a side of Eli that as his mother she had never seen, and that Clare had basically brought Eli back from hell after Julia and now after his battle with drugs. Clare was silent from several moments as she let the heavy revelations sit on her mind before she answered honestly. "Cece, I am so happy that I've been able to help Eli in the ways that I have, I can't imagine not loving forever." Clare heard Cece let out a wistful sight before asking Clare if she and Eli had at sex yet, Clare spluttered and stumbled over her words as she tried to figure out the most appropriate response for her boyfriend's mum. Cece just laughed and made Clare promise that whatever their sexual situation was at this moment and in the future that they would be safe. Clare had just squeak her agreement before turning the conversation to Bullfrog and his work at the radio station.

* * *

As Clare walked back towards her apartment after a long day of lectures, she let her mind wander to what would have happened if she hadn't agreed to fly out to Toronto and be a part of Eli's intervention. She tried to imagine the state that Eli would be in, how Bullfrog and Cece would be coping, if Eli would still be school and as morbid as it seems, if Eli would even still be alive. Clare had been so wrapped up in her own thoughts that she hadn't noticed a man pacing outside her apartment door, banging on it every so often.

"Dad, what are you doing here?! Clare exclaimed as her absent father spun on his feet, his hair sticking up in all directions.  
"Clare! Thank goodness, you're safe! Now where is he? I'm going to kill him!"  
"Kill him? Kill who? Dad, I live alone. No boys."

Clare stepped past her dad to open the door to her apartment before turning to her father and nodded towards her opened door as an invitation. She watched him inspect her tiny apartment, peering in the bathroom room, and trying to look under the end whilst trying to act casual.

"Dad, Clare sighed, "what are you doing here? We haven't really spoken since you left for Philadelphia."  
"I got an email from your mother telling me that, that drug addict Elijah Goldsworthy was living with you in New York, and I want to kill him for what he put you through, so where is he Clare? Where in this tiny apartment are you hiding him?"

Clare looked at her father with her jaw basically on the floor. Kill him? Her dad has to be crazy.  
"Dad, did you check the date on this email, because Eli hasn't been her for about 2 weeks now, he's back home in Canada living with his parents."  
She watched her dad physically relax and flop into the closest chair. "Oh good, you've seen sense and kicked him out Clare, I knew you were still smart."  
"Kicked him out? Dad, he went home to finish high school then he's coming back out here, and living HERE with me. He's sober, I helped him get clean, and we got back together. I LOVE HIM." Clare stressed several words in her sentence, because she knew on some level despite her father being a well-educated man, he could be really thick sometimes.  
Clare had to stifle a chuckle as she watched her father resemble a fish out of water, his eyes wide, his mouth trying to form sentence. "He hurt you Clare, and you took him back?" Her father's face was full of confusion; it was almost as if he didn't understand how his smart daughter could love someone like Eli.  
"You don't know him dad, he's changed. Ask mum, ask Jake, ask Glen, hell even ask his parents! People get treatment for addictions all the time, but who knew that the only treatment that Eli needed was to be taken away from Degrassi and brought to New York to be reminded of his directorial dreams."

It had taken 2 hours and half a bottle of whiskey before Clare's father had accepted that his youngest daughter was hell bent on living and loving her high school boyfriend who just so happened to be an ex drug addict. As she hugged her father goodbye, she told him to check date stamps on emails more carefully and to stay in touch because she did miss him.

When Clare relayed the story to Eli later in the evening, it seemed unreal that her father had been standing in her living room several hours previous with the sole intention of killing her boyfriend and skinning him alive. Naturally Eli found the whole thing hilarious, and so did Bullfrog and Cece whom Eli had called in and made Clare retell the whole story for his parents benefit.

Clare missed this, laughing with Eli, it wasn't the same through a screen, but it was only going to be 2 more weeks, and then Eli graduates and moves out her with her, and they can start the rest of their lives together. It was this moment that Clare wished she had a way to speed time up.

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Well, here you go. I hope it wasn't TOO terrible and that you at least enjoyed SOME of it. Please let me know if you loved it or hated it in the reviews!

Love Marie

xx


	9. Chapter 9

So here is the next instalment, I hope you's enjoy it (It's definitely not what people were expecting.)

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Eli was nervous, more nervous than he had been in a while; why did he think this was a good idea? What in the world had possessed him to ask Talia to meet him? On some level, Eli knew that this was a bad idea, a very bad idea.

He tapped his fingers in a drumming motion on the park bench he sat on, not his and Clare's special bench, but just a random picnic table in the middle of the park. He felt like the park was a safe and neutral place to meet Talia, because he really didn't want anyone seeing him with her, because he knew what people would say, and he didn't want word getting back to Clare, losing her again was not what he wanted.

He could see her approaching, swallowing back the nerves and putting on a steely front was the safest way to have this conversation with her, because if she even seen one tiny piece of emotion she would pull at it until he unravelled again; and unravelling was not fun in Eli's books, and it wasn't something that he wanted to undergo again.

"No bodyguards this time, Eli? Where's the blonde girl and costume guy?" He could hear the mockery in her voice.  
Eli winced internally he didn't need bodyguards, he just wasn't ready to have this conversation with her, but he was as ready as he was ever going to be. Although he told Clare he had managed to beat his Talia related demons, there was always a few lingering ones that stuck about in the back of his head, and with his exams starting next week, the last thing he wanted was to be sitting in the middle of Calculus exam and Talia's voice to creep into his head and tell him he wasn't good enough – so having this conversation with her was the best way to finally rid himself of his past with her, and have a fresh new start with Clare in New York.

"No, no "bodyguards, just me and you. We need to talk Talia." He put air quotes around bodyguards because although Maya and Tristan had been there when he needed them without him really having them follow him about 24/7, so they weren't his bodyguards and if they were then they were doing a really bad job.

"No shit Sherlock, you did text me saying we needed to talk, I thought we were here to do a rain dance." Eli had forgotten how dry her sense of humour was and had to fight back a smile, because smiling was an emotion and emotions was one thing he didn't need to show, at least not in front of her.

"I didn't want to leave for New York and not have this conversation with you, because it's important for my recovery that I deal with all my demons, both internal and … physical." Talia didn't say anything, just rolled her eyes and sat next to him on the table of the picnic bench. Eli took her silence as a prompt to continue.

"You were there during a really hard time, I had just found Cam's body, and it really messed me up – after everything that had happened with my bipolar and Morty and Julia, it really didn't seem like death was following me around. Then I met you and somehow you gave me a way to escape from everyone and all their questions about Cam and if I was ok and if I was dealing with it. I lied and told them I was fine, when in reality, I don't deal well with situations that I don't fully understand – I never understood why Julia had to die, why that idiot ran a red light, why I have bipolar, why Cam had to kill himself when he had Maya, his family, friends and a bright hockey career ahead of him. So I took what I thought was the easy way out, I turned to drugs because I thought that I would be able to stop whenever I wanted too, that I could just wake up one day and my first thought not be about when we could get high next, or where I was going to get my next score of weed or MDMA. But the further the drugs and the partying and to an extent you pulled me in, the further I pulled away from Clare, my parents, my friends and my dreams of being a director until Clare left me, I never spoke to Imogen, Fiona, Adam or Drew, and my dreams of going to New York was a distant memory that was never achievable because I was too messed up, I mean who wanted a kid that death followed in their class?" Eli paused as he tried to gather his thoughts, he really didn't want to break down in front of Talia, because every other time he'd had a similar conversation with Clare, his parents, Adam, his therapist or Mr Simpson he always cried, and this wasn't a crying situation.

"I can't tell if you're blaming yourself, the drugs or me here, Eli. I know you were messed up and everything, but you could have easily said no. Your extremely independent Eli, I don't get why you followed everything I said." Talia's question made something click in Eli's mind. From day one of his recovery, he had been blaming Talia for his addictions, but maybe that wasn't completely true.

"I think I'm splitting the blame between the three when I think about it – I'm blaming myself because I know I shouldn't have gotten mixed up in that scene because of my past issues and because whatever I took could have reacted badly with my bipolar meds. I'm putting some blame on the drugs because despite it being my fault that I was taking them, it's their fault for numbing me to the point where I thought they were helping. And I'm blaming you, because you knew how vulnerable I was, and you have to admit yourself that you did take advantage of that on some level." He took her silence as an agreement. "I wanted at least clear up some of the air between us, because you were there during a really hard time and you do deserve some credit, because you were and are my biggest demon in my recovery and if I didn't think I could handle this conversation or if my treatment wasn't working, then we wouldn't be having this conversation or we would be having a completely different type of conversation."

"I'll admit that I kinda influenced you with the whole drugs scene and everything, but when I saw you sitting that hallway not long after Campbell's death was announced, you looked so broke and I wanted to be the one to fix you so badly – but come on Eli, that was like a broken plate trying to put a broken cup back together, it doesn't really work. So I pulled you into my scene because I thought it might help, but I could see it in your eyes that it wasn't helping. I became very observant with you, because there were good days when you smoked some weed, but the harder days like Cam's funeral, or when his parents came to get his stuff, you turned to MDMA, when Clare left for New York, you had to get your stomach pumped because you drank too much and took some bad ecstasy pills. Or when your parents went mad at you and tried to send you to rehab you went back to MDMA. When Imogen and Fiona graduated, you sat with a bottle of vodka and didn't say a word to anyone. When someone would pick on Adam, you looked like you wanted to say something, but restrained yourself because things had been tense between you and Adam since you punched Drew because he had tried to talk some sense into you, you went and mixed weed, MDMA and booze! You were a mess Eli, but I never tried to stop you, and I guess I am sorry about that."

Eli didn't say anything, for one he was speechless Talia had admitted that she was partly to blame for his breakdown, but on the other hand, there really wasn't much else to say. He had gotten everything off his chest that he wanted to say, and he felt content with his feelings towards Talia and what had previously happened. They would never be friends but at least she wouldn't scream at him randomly anymore.  
Eli stood and turned to her, "See you around Talia and good luck at Degrassi next year." He didn't even wait for a reply; he walked off towards The Dot, pulling his phone out and texting Adam to see if he wanted to go check out the new comic books that would have arrived at the comic book store this afternoon.

For the first time since he had returned to Canada, Eli felt comfortable here, like he didn't have to walk on egg shells anymore.

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Whilst browsing the comic books with Adam half an hour later, Eli was trying to decide how to bring up the fact that he had spoken to Talia. He knew that he would have to tell them eventually; because Talia was one secret he couldn't keep. He had already phoned his parents and discussed it with them whilst he had waited outside The Dot; they had agreed on Eli meeting with his therapist again, just so he could talk about how he felt seeing Talia again. It only meant he had Adam and Clare to tell – he was sure Adam would be ok with it, but he could never predict how Clare would react in situations, especially one like this.

"I kinda have to tell you something man." Eli tried to remain as casual as he could, but he winced as he watched Adam freeze as if someone had pressed a pause button.  
"I went to see Talia and we talked, and she did take some of the blame for the drugs and everything last year, and I've already spoken to my parents and I'm seeing my shrink next Tuesday to discuss it even further. She didn't offer me anything, and I didn't ask or take anything." Eli blurted out all at once, barely taking in a breath; he face flushed slightly, his eyes trained on Adam who had turned to stare at Eli with wide eyes. He watched his best friend nod slowly, before turning back to the comic books and holding one up for Eli's comment. Eli grinned before going on to tell Adam that the storyline was bland and it was more romance than action; Adam's reply was to scrunch up his face and continue browsing.

Grinning to himself, Eli relished in the fact that Adam had taken the news well, which only meant he had to have this conversation with Clare, and he really really wasn't sure how she would react. Eli could only hope it was for the best, because he couldn't deal with sleeping in those armchairs when he got back to New York, because although they were comfy to sit in, they weren't the most comfortable of places to sleep.

"Just three more exams left at Degrassi." Eli thought, "Only three more exams and I'll be back in New York with Clare in our tiny apartment; and everything will be normal again."

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Remember to review and let me know how you felt about it! I'm really interested in what you have to say, or how much you loved/hated it! Or if you have any suggestion or improvements!


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